See You Again
by Gamer-Otaku Takara
Summary: After Thane's death, Shepard has to find some way to cope. Not with alcohol, or trying to find someone new...no, she's going to try...hope. Thane/FemShep one-shot, Shepard's POV. Inspired by the song "See You Again" by Carrie Underwood...which is also included. I own nothing!


See You Again

_ Thane is dead._

_ Those words still haven't registered in my brain yet. Even as I stand there with Kolyat, staring down at his lifeless body as it lay on that damned hospital bed…I still expect him to open his beautiful black eyes, gaze at me with that special look that told me I was the most important thing in the galaxy to him…talk to me in that deep, rumbling voice I love so much, say, "Everything will be alright, siha." But he never does. _

_ "Kolyat…" My brow furrows with the effort to keep the tears at bay. I'm Commander Shepard, savior of the galaxy…it would be shameful to cry in front of others. "Why did the last verse say 'she'?"_

_ "My father had already made his peace with the universe, Commander," the young drell responded softly. "His wish was for you."_

_ My lower lip trembles. Even as he was drawing his last breath, Thane only thought of me… My vision blurs as tears fill my eyes, dangerously close to overflowing. I turn my head away just as a tear slides down my cheek. "I…I need to go. If you need anything, Kolyat…or if you just want to talk, let me know."_

_ "Of course. Thank you, Shepard."_

_ I nod, before turning and rushing out of the room, making a beeline for the elevator. I need to leave the Citadel…go somewhere where I can be alone. That's what I needed right now… As the elevator doors close, I drift into thought._

_ I have known since the day I met Thane that he was dying. He told me all about his illness, and yet, I still fell in love with him. There was no stopping it…he and I were drawn to one another from the start. The first time I laid eyes on him, I had felt a jolt, like electricity in my veins. And the first time he smiled at me…that had been my undoing. But no matter how many times he would remind me that he was dying, that loving him would only end in grief…I foolishly ignored it. It seemed impossible to me that Thane would ever die, that he would ever not be by my side…where he belongs. He belongs with me, not in some hospital surrounded by doctors and machines. He belongs on the Normandy, in Life Support, where everybody had grown so accustomed to seeing him._

_ But now he's dead. He's gone, forever, and there isn't a damned thing I can do about it…and it's tearing me apart._

_ I step out of the elevator and into Docking Bay D-24. I am aware of several pairs of eyes watching me as I pass, but my gaze is trained forward. I open the airlock to the Normandy and calmly board my ship. I nod to my crew when they salute me, instead of greeting them with a pleasant "hello". Everybody seemed to be…quieter. They know about my lover's death, and they want to give me some space…that thought is a comforting one, but comfort isn't what I need. What I need…is Thane._

_ As I collapse onto my bed, sobbing and crying for the first time in a very long time, those words finally sink in._

_ Thane is dead._

* * *

I slowly open my eyes, the memory fading from my mind's eye. It's been two weeks…two weeks since the man I love died. I still haven't recovered…especially after the funeral, and Kolyat gave me the video messages Thane tried to send me.

I lean against the giant window of the observation deck, absentmindedly turning something over and over in my hands. It's one of the buckles to Thane's jacket…shortly after we defeated the Collectors, this buckle was starting to fall off. I bought him a new jacket…but something made me decide to keep the loose buckle. To this day, I don't have a clue why I did it…but now, I'm glad I did. It's a simple thing, but it makes me think of him…

I have never regretted loving him. Thane Krios was…is…the best thing that has ever happened to me. Even if I could turn back the clock, the only thing I would change…obviously, I would make sure Kai Leng's sword never touched him, instead of standing there, gawking like an idiot. A tiny, selfish part of me believes that things would have been better off if I had never fallen for him…but that part is drowned out by the part of me that wouldn't trade the time I spent with Thane for anything in the galaxy.

Another memory flashes in my mind. I think of the moment on the Citadel, when we were leaving the Silversun Strip. When everybody left, and I remained leaning against the rail…and Thane's spirit spoke to me. His words still ring clear. I will defeat the Reapers…and when the time comes, I'll see him again. My heart still aches at the thought of him, but I refuse to believe that it could end like this. Thane always spoke of the afterlife, and I remember him telling me that he would "meet me across the sea"…well, if that's where the afterlife is going to take me…as long as Thane is there waiting for me, I wouldn't mind skipping out on heaven.

I stare out into the great, empty void. A sad look forms on my face. I need to focus my attention on the Reapers. If I don't unite the galaxy, there's no way we're going to win this war. I'll always be thinking of Thane…and I'll always love him. That will never change…but I can't let my grief consume me. I have to believe that we'll meet again someday.

Then, a song rises to my throat. It starts as a hum at first, until the words ring out through the room…

"Said goodbye, turned around,  
And you were gone, gone, gone.  
Faded into the setting sun,  
Slipped away.  
But I won't cry, cause I know

I'll never be lonely.  
For you are the stars to me.  
You are the light I follow!

"I will see you again, whoa,  
This is not where it ends.  
I will carry you with me! Oh,  
'Til I see you again…"

I hear the door open behind me, and the voices of Tali, Liara, James, Ashley, Garrus, even Joker join in with mine.

"_Ohh, ohh, ohh, ohhh,  
__Ohh, ohh, ohh ohhh_..."

They fall silent, gathering around me as I continue…

"I can hear those echoes in the wind at night.  
Calling me back in time…  
Back to you.  
In a place far away,  
Where the water meets the sky!  
The thought of it makes me smile.  
You are my tomorrow!

"I will see you again, whoa,  
This is not where it ends.  
I will carry you with me! Oh,  
'Til I see you again."

I lower my head, my eyes stinging as tears fill them.

"Sometimes, I feel my heart is breaking.  
But I stay strong, and I hold on, cause I know…  
I will see you again, whoa.  
This is not where it ends.  
I will carry you with me, yeah, yeah!

"I will see you again, whoa,  
This is not where it ends.  
I will carry you with me! Oh,  
'Til I see you again."

Tali and Liara each grab one of my hands, and we smile at each other. Ashley and Garrus lay a hand on my shoulder.

"_Ohh, ohh, ohh, ohhh."_

"Till I see you again."

"_Ohh, ohh, ohh ohhh_."

"Till I see you agaaaiin!  
Oh-whoa, till I see you again!

"Said goodbye, turned around,  
And you were gone, gone, gone…"

As our voices fade, I stare out into the void once more. And as my friends silently embrace me in a group hug, I smile to myself, clutching the buckle tightly in my hand.

_I love you, Thane. Someday, I'll meet you across the sea…and you had better be waiting for me at the shore._


End file.
